Instant noodles, instant visas and instant realizations

So on Wednesday at 00:01AM, I became an illegal immigrant in China. Yes my visa had run out but thankfully I was already on a train to Hong Kong to sort out my new one. Since I cannot get the F-visa I need to do my internship in China, I have to leave the country to do it. Here's what really bugs me, and the American dude in the waiting room at the visa agent was also of a similar opinion; I cannot get an F visa in China, even if I supply all the required documentation which confirms that I am legitimate and that a company is taking responsibility for me. But I can go to Hong Kong and they do not even require me to submit an invitation letter, let alone copies of the company business license and registration information. It's ridiculous! I just have to pay someone to do it for me, even if I'm just planning to piss about in the country and do nothing for a year.

They've started restricting F-visas recently, not handing them out like candy. I've heard the reason is because too many people are coming here as tourists and just enjoy the 3 month permission to hang around China. Also, people are using them to work proper jobs.. which is technically illegal. I'm sure that if they cracked down on HK visa agents and let people who can provide all the evidence that their application is bonafide, then they would benefit from less visa abuse. It would also save hundreds, if not thousands, of legitimate F-visa applicants the 20 hour train journey from Shanghai-Hong Kong. It makes no sense... unless the tri-monthly train fare is some form of government tax.

It annoys me so much because I am on an intern's budget. I'm living on peanuts at the moment and I cannot really afford the 1000RMB return trip, the 1700RMB visa charge and then the more expensive food and accommodation that entering a developed country brings. And while I went to watch a movie today, and had a Thai curry for dinner... I will be living on instant noodles for the next 48 hours. I predict that I will spend around 3700RMB on this trip... which is an ENTIRE month's salary for me. I think I might have a word with my boss and see if I can get some of that reimbursed, because I am really going out on a limb to intern for these guys.

So as I eat my instant ramen and wait for my instant visa (I applied at like 3pm and I can collect it tomorrow... insane!), I am thinking about Hong Kong and whether I like it or not. Last year I came here with my friend while we were traveling around China. There was the worst rainfall for 140 years, the humidity was intolerable and the nightlife was bar focused. One day I will write a huge rant about the reason for this, but that will take some time. I'd heard so many great things about HK but I could definitely skip living here for any period longer than a week. One thing you realize the second you arrive here, is that this is possibly the most consumerist city on earth. There are nothing but shops here. It's great if you're rich and can go shopping, but it's hell for an intern. You instantly understand that your entire stay will be gazing dreamily through shop windows and thinking twice before making any purchases.

Coming to HK alone is also really crappy. The problem with these glitzy places with 10 Gucci stores and hotel entrances that appear to compete with each other purely by building huge water fountains, is that you realize what a nobody you are! Hah, that sounds pretty depressing but run with me for a sec. It's not that you're worthless, it's just that you cannot get into the Hong Kong culture and life without having the minimum requirement of a fat wallet. In Shanghai you can go to places like this, where you feel people disapprove of you as soon as you set foot in the door. In fact, Shanghai is often worse for this.. sometimes it does feel incredibly elitist. Hong Kong has a similar feeling. The malls aren't empty here, some people can afford this stuff... or the people who can't are sick of peering in through the glass. It's nice to see that. But still you feel you're missing out on 'The best of HK'. I can imagine coming here when I'm super rich and really enjoying the place. As there is nothing else to do but shop, HK is kinda lost on me. Hong Kong feels like a place where money does buy happiness. It could be just that I'm a bit lonely here by myself, but it does seem like fame and fortune would be a LOT of fun out here.

It gives me something to aspire to. Although it's pretty low on my list of priorities. I think anyone whose goal is to be able to buy expensive clothes in HK needs to rethink their lives a bit!

Hmmm.. my ultimate goal in life is to get one of these watches though:

Platinum Les Cabinotiers watch by Vacheron Constantin

I think an exception can be made for that.

All about the Maos

So I got my first good sleep since I arrived last night. I've been napping a lot, might be the heat or really long jetlag but I've felt the need to have a few hours in the middle of the day. Then I wake up at 6am the next day and the cycle repeats. Indeed, last night I went to bed at 9:30pm because I'd been running around town looking for apartments. 6 hours and I found one I kinda liked, but it only had 3 bedrooms (and therefore only 2 people). Fortunately I was waiting on a response from a 6 bedroom flat I saw the other day and I got the greenlight to move in! So that's cool, gonna be out of this hostel in 3 days. That's just a little update on the housing situation. Now onto the main subject of this blog.

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The amount stuff costs in Shanghai is really warped compared to the UK. I was speaking to an estate agent yesterday and she said that everything is quite affordable, except housing. I think it's the complete opposite. For example, in Manchester my 3 bedroom student flat in a decent location was £480 a month (around 4900RMB). In Shanghai my maximum budget (which I'm hitting) is around £240 a month (2500RMB). That is hella cheap if you've ever rented property in the UK. If I actually had a real job, I could live somewhere absolutely incredible... maybe something for the future ;)

After deciding to go out for lunch (as in, spend more than 4RMB on street food) I was in the main shopping area of Shanghai (well one of them anyway); Nanjing Xi Lu. This area has so many designer brands and podgy white people that you would think you were in New York if it wasn't for the humidity. Since I'm here on my own, and haven't got anyone to hang around with, I've just been leisurely exploring malls and seeing what there is. My primary goal is to find an arcade with a Drummania game, so I can get my percussion fix.. but alas I've come up short every time. Secondly I've been trying to work out what sort of stuff I can afford over here. In Shanghai I can get a very decent sized meal for about 50RMB (£5 now, £3.50 back then). On the other hand, if I wanted to get a Chocolate Sundae at some American chain it would cost about the same. So you can have a banquet or an ice-cream for the same price. Weird huh?

Things are a lot different now than they used to be. As a result of Gordon Brown dumping my UK-Chinese savings onto a slab and cutting a fat third off of the amount, things are expensive over here. Despite the fact that the majority of the higher end brands are made in China, it's often more expensive to buy clothes here than in the UK! Take Lacoste for example, in the UK a Lacoste polo shirt is likely to cost about £65ish? I think.. I don't actually own one but that price rings a bell when I was looking pre-departure. In Shanghai a Lacoste polo shirt costs around 900RMB (£85)... and that's a cheap one. Before the credit crunch 900RMB was only about £65, but now it's £20 more. In another shop I saw a Lacoste shirt (I think, it had the same logo) for 1100RMB reduced from 3300RMB.... reduced from 6600RMB!!! That's like £640 for a polo shirt. Even before the credit crunch that is absolutely ridiculous. If you compare that to my rent, I could get a house for 2.5 months (6250RMB) or I could get a polo shirt (6600RMB). Drinks are also way too pricey. Now £10 is only 100RMB, those bottles of beer for 50RMB are not so appealing anymore. £5 for a bottle of beer... you really do not realize how expensive things are until you convert them and think of where in England would you pay £5 for a bottle of beer.

What does the typical Chinese executive earn these days? It's absolutely ludicrous how high these things are priced. No-one can afford it! The mall (Plaza 66) is rather empty, at least all the shops inside, so it's obvious that these stores are just there to keep up appearances. Even if I earnt a decent salary, the price of even the lower range of luxury brands are unaffordable (affordability of course includes value for money, even if I could buy it I wouldn't). So I just browsed... from outside the stores. Some of it was the shame of walking into a place that expensive wearing messy Vans with shorts and a t-shirt that has seen better days. There are other problems with Chinese shops that I gotsta tell you about but that can be saved for later.

After a thoroughly depressing afternoon, realizing that my idea of coming to China and living like a pimp, I went to a more regular store; the Puma store near Nanjing Xi Lu Subway. I found a pair of trainers that I really liked, for 419RMB with 30% off. That's what I'm talking about! But they didn't have my size. Seriously, anyone who says that the 'All Asian men have small penises' theory is a myth needs to try and get a pair of shoes in Shanghai. They didn't have US11? Come on! I might go back and ask them to order in a pair, if they can.

My worries were confirmed when I left the subway heading back to the hostel. I walked off the train and saw a white guy, about 24ish, wearing a t-shirt with a huge hole over the left sleeve. Got a feeling that's going to be me by the time I leave Shanghai.

The Plan

It's the fifth day I've been here and I'm starting to feel like I should probably have some sort of plan. I mean, I'm currently staying in a youth hostel, eating out every night (although I'm not sure if this will change) with about £50 left in my wallet. Not exactly an ideal situation for someone who intends to make Shanghai his new home. I've also got really lazy and boring! Yesterday I had breakfast with a friend I met on Friday night in the Bund area. I checked out the stores and walked about for a few hours then I came back to the hostel and just crashed. I woke up at 5pm and just sat around on my laptop until about 12:30. I know I'm living here for a long time, but I do feel a bit embarrassed sitting around all day. It looks like I'm just the worst tourist ever.

So here's the plan:

1. Find an apartment
Definitely the first thing I've got to do. I'm a big fan of Le Tour (my hostel) but I should really get my own place, my own housemates (this is the main reason) and make this city my own. I've been emailing enquiries about rooms all morning, but it is only 8am so I'm not expecting replies for a while.

I'd like to live in the Jing'an area I think. It's a great location for entertainment and work, so I'm setting my sights on there. The great thing about Shanghai is that taxis are really cheap, so is the subway.. so no matter where I am it's not a big deal getting to work.

2. Get my money
This probably could take precedence over the apartment hunt due to a rubbish catch 22 situation. I need money to pay the apartment deposit and first month's rent. I can't get my money until I have a bank account. I don't think I can get a bank account without a residence permit.

My solution is to take out as much as I can from ATM machines. I think I get charged about £2 for every £200 I take out. I guess I'll withdraw enough for a deposit and month of rent, then I'll wire over the rest of my money when I receive it in England (people owe me a shit load). That should work.

3. Set up a bank account
Apparently it's quite easy. I need to choose a bank though. I like the sound of the China Construction Bank because it's a badass name, but I'll probably just go with the Bank of China because it's the biggest. Once I set that up, hopefully I can transfer all my savings to Shangers.

4. Find an internship
It's what I came here for. As I said in a previous post, I didn't get the uberjob I was hoping for. However I've just sent a CV in to a software development company for a position in 'Marketing & Business Development'. I've heard they need 6 trainees for 3 positions, so they're pretty good odds. My CV isn't as rubbish as it looks (I did get to the interview phase for uberjob) so hopefully I'll hear back within the next couple of days. I'll get paid about 4000RMB a month I think, which pays for rent and I'll still have spending money. It's a relief, because money worries were kinda getting to me.

5. Have the best 18 months of my life
OK I've probably jinxed it now, but I really do need to make the most of this. I think the next blog post I do, I'll come up with a list of all the ideas and opportunities I will look into while I'm here. After that, and an update on the items on this list... that's it! I'll be settled and will have to come up with something more imaginative that what is effectively my diary... online.